🚗 The myth of "full self-driving"

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🚗 The myth of "full self-driving"

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Tonight, we're looking into Tesla's "full self-driving" feature that, um, isn't. Plus: the brutal irony facing Biden on the global stage... Let's get into it.

By Allison Morrow

🚗 OY, TESLA

Here at Nightcap we're accepting nominations for the most misleadingly named products on the market. First up, Tesla's "full self-driving" software.

My colleague Matt McFarland talked to a bunch of drivers who've been guinea pigs for Tesla's new driver-assist features. To be clear, when Tesla talks about "full self-driving" it does not mean "autonomous." (Our judges give that a 10/10 in the "Recklessly Deceptive" category.)

Tesla itself warns drivers that the technology "may do the wrong thing at the worst time, so you must always keep your hands on the wheel and pay extra attention to the road." Which sounds like, I dunno, driving a regular car? My 2008 Subaru may not be flashy, but at least she won't go all Christine on me without warning.

Anyway, according to the drivers Matt spoke to, the software is inconsistent at best:

Key quote: "It drove like a 9-year-old who had only driven in [Grand Theft Auto] before, and got behind the wheel," said John Bernal, who owns a Tesla Model 3, of when he first got "full self-driving," of FSD, early this year. "Now I feel like I'm driving with my grandma. Sometimes it might make a mistake, like, 'no grandma, that's a one-way, sorry.'"
Turn signals go on and off randomly at times, other drivers say.
FSD sometimes neglects "road closure" signs.
Sometimes it brakes unexpectedly.
Sometimes it plots a course directly into other fixed objects such as poles and rocks.
It can also befuddle other drivers on the road, such as when it is painfully slow to take its turn at a four-way stop. "We're trying. We're sorry!" said one reviewer who recorded his drive on video. "Everyone's rolling their eyes at us. We just pissed off about 12 people right there."

In fairness, drivers say the technology generally is improving. In one case it identified a cyclist ahead before the human driver saw the person. Though presumably the driver would have seen that cyclist eventually.

(Tesla did not respond to a request for comment, and generally doesn't engage with journalists.)

MY TWO CENTS

I don't want to be the luddite here, but driving is like speaking a language — there are subtle nuances and physical, human-to-human gestures that vary widely around the world.

In New York, for example, when I honk at you, it's not personal – I am merely expressing the frustration we all feel being stuck on this one-way street behind a double-parked delivery truck. When I flip you off, we all know that that translates to, "Hey buddy I get it we all have somewhere to be, please consider using your turn signal and have a lovely day." Will a "full self-driving Tesla" ever be able to experience the profound shame that human drivers do when they swerve into the bike lane and are (rightly) barraged with obscenities by cyclists? I don't believe they will. Do we really want to live in a world where getting from point A to point B doesn't involve hand gestures and shouting? Fughettaboutit.

(But in all seriousness, folks, this sounds super dangerous. Hands at 10 and 2 at all times, please.)

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#️⃣ NUMBER OF THE DAY

18%

Moderna stock plunged 18% Thursday after the company fell short of profit and sales expectations for the third quarter, and it warned that it is dealing with production and shipment issues that will push some of its deliveries back to 2022, especially for exports overseas. For those keeping track at home, that means the supply chain crisis isn't just a headache that'll delay your Christmas gifts – it's delaying the Covid vaccine to people who desperately need it.

❄️ TIME TO CHILL

Winter in the Northern Hemisphere is right around the corner, and the world is facing an acute energy shortage that's driving up prices and threatening to leave millions without heat.

The response from Russia and OPEC? Bundle up, softies.

On Thursday, energy ministers from major oil and gas producers basically ignored pleas from President Biden to increase the supply of energy to help bring costs down.

The coalition is sticking with its plan to gradually increase production, but not so much that it dings their profits.

A BIT OF CONTEXT

The price of Brent crude oil, the global benchmark, fell to negative territory early in the pandemic as the global economy shut down. But, of course, economies roared back to life, spurring demand.
Crude prices have now doubled over the past year to $83 a barrel, and some estimate it could go as high as $120 by June.
The coalition that controls the global supply is known as OPEC-plus, led by Russia and Saudi Arabia.
US gas prices have surged to a seven-year high of $3.40 a gallon nationally and are flirting with $4 in some states. Gasoline and diesel prices have hit record highs in parts of Europe and the United Kingdom too.

Let's savor the irony of the moment real quick...

Right now, the US and other countries at the COP26 conference are trying to map out a global shift away from fossil fuels. And it's a mad scramble, because we've failed for years to make investments in alternative energies and now we have the catastrophic effects of climate change hanging like a Sword of Damocles over our heads. At the exact same time, we're essentially begging for more oil.

"With regard to the US, yes we have been having discussions at all levels and we still believe we are doing the right job and the most convenient job," Saudi energy minister Prince Abdulaziz bin Salman said Thursday. Translation: Yeah, we're going to do our own thing, but nice of you to stop by!

In summary: We must end our dependence on fossil fuels. And we desperately need fossil fuels right now. Biden summed up the dilemma himself on Sunday: "On the surface, it seems like an irony, but the truth of the matter is ... the idea we're going to be able to move to renewable energy overnight and ... from this moment on, not use oil or not use gas or not use hydrogen is just not rational."

WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON?

💉 Ford just became the first major US automaker to mandate vaccines for most of its 32,000 salaried employees.

🎰 MGM Resorts is putting the Mirage hotel and casino in Las Vegas up for sale, ending its 21-year ownership of one of the Strip's most famous properties.

💸 The US trade deficit jumped to a record high in September as exports slumped. The trade gap surged 11.2% to a record $80.9 billion.

🍬 Junk-food-flation: Kraft Heinz and Mondelez are raising prices on all your favorite snacks, including Mac & Cheese, Jell-O, Bagel Bites, Cool Whip, Toblerone and Sour Patch Kids.